The simple answer to that is yes. Grief is associated with loss. Most people automatically associate grief with loss of a loved one, whether it is a family member, close relative, friend, co-worker, pet or class mate. When we look at the association of loss and grief, it can hit us at many different times during our life without us realizing that is what we are going through. Many people will feel like they are just going through sadness in their life, or are in a depressed mood, but don’t really know why. Others are anxious and nervous acting and can’t explain it, while some will be angry and mad at others for no reason at all. These people will often go to their primary care physician (PCP) and their PCP will prescribe an anti-depressant or anti-anxiety without doing a loss timeline to see if the person is suffering from unknown or unresolved grief.
Death has dominated the focus of grief for centuries, but grief can happen anytime we lose something we value. It does not have to die; it just has to be in our life no more. We form many attachments to many people, places and things as we grow and develop and during this time, these attachments become a part of who we are, a part of our identity. When they are taken away from us, we are losing a part of ourselves. Much of this happens in our childhood, and we don’t really understand it because we are too young to be able to express and label our emotions. As a child, we may act out, or behave differently when in reality we are grieving something that may not be apparent to the caregiver. Here are some examples of losses we can incur during life that can cause grief, this list is not inclusive. There is not enough paper to write down all the things that can cause one to grieve:
· A change in school causing a loss of friends
· Losing a job, especially if it has been a long term job
· Moving from one town to another
· Your youngest child leaving for college or moving off on their own
· A child moving from middle school to high school
· A change in positions at work, putting you with all new co-workers
· Your best friend is school moving away
· Your best friend in adult life moving away
· A relocation or transfer in your job
· A relationship breakup of any kind
· Aging- loss of the ability to do things how we once were able to
The list goes on and on. We each have things we become attached to, that are important to us and are valuable to us and when they are gone, we need to grieve the loss of these things. We must first recognize the loss, accept the fact that it is a loss and then understand the grieving process. Remember that we were made to grieve; the Bible says “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” (Matt. 5:4, NKJV). It is properly identifying that loss and grieving over it that allows God to comfort us and free us from the pain that we suffer so that we may move forward, free from the bondage that held us. So when you are feeling sad or depressed, think back and see if you have suffered a loss recently that might have contributed to this feeling. If so, recognize the loss as a loss and go through the process of grief so the God may comfort you and heal you.
Death has dominated the focus of grief for centuries, but grief can happen anytime we lose something we value. It does not have to die; it just has to be in our life no more. We form many attachments to many people, places and things as we grow and develop and during this time, these attachments become a part of who we are, a part of our identity. When they are taken away from us, we are losing a part of ourselves. Much of this happens in our childhood, and we don’t really understand it because we are too young to be able to express and label our emotions. As a child, we may act out, or behave differently when in reality we are grieving something that may not be apparent to the caregiver. Here are some examples of losses we can incur during life that can cause grief, this list is not inclusive. There is not enough paper to write down all the things that can cause one to grieve:
· A change in school causing a loss of friends
· Losing a job, especially if it has been a long term job
· Moving from one town to another
· Your youngest child leaving for college or moving off on their own
· A child moving from middle school to high school
· A change in positions at work, putting you with all new co-workers
· Your best friend is school moving away
· Your best friend in adult life moving away
· A relocation or transfer in your job
· A relationship breakup of any kind
· Aging- loss of the ability to do things how we once were able to
The list goes on and on. We each have things we become attached to, that are important to us and are valuable to us and when they are gone, we need to grieve the loss of these things. We must first recognize the loss, accept the fact that it is a loss and then understand the grieving process. Remember that we were made to grieve; the Bible says “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” (Matt. 5:4, NKJV). It is properly identifying that loss and grieving over it that allows God to comfort us and free us from the pain that we suffer so that we may move forward, free from the bondage that held us. So when you are feeling sad or depressed, think back and see if you have suffered a loss recently that might have contributed to this feeling. If so, recognize the loss as a loss and go through the process of grief so the God may comfort you and heal you.
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